The Four Loves: Reflections
進階英文作文 2Ac 陳虹文
“God is love (11).” It was the first sentence and the key point in the introduction. First, it divided love into Gift-love and Need-love. Also, it talked about the differences of Gift-love and Need-love. For example, Need-love was more selfish than Gift-love. Then, it talked about God. It compared the demon with God. It seems that everything can’t break away God.
And I agree some sentences in the introduction. “We are born helpless (12).” I think it is right because we have to through others’ help to let us learn more, such as how to get along with others, how to try our best to help others, how to love, how to show our concern to someone and so on.
Also, “A tyrannous and gluttonous demand for affection can be a horrible thing (13)”. People are always greedy. When they get what they want, they will want to get more. It seems that it won’t have the day which people will feel satisfaction. Sometimes people will persist on something that is unnecessary and force other people to do it together. For me, it is a very horrible thing. It will not only damage the feeling between friends or family but also make other people feel antipathy to you.
Likings and Loves for the Sub-Human
In this chapter, first, it talks about like and love. People always say that they love something rather than like something. Love and like are different and I think we have to distinguish the difference between them. Second, I learned that pleasures can be divided into two classes which are Need-pleasures and Pleasures of Appreciation.
“When Need-pleasures are in question we tend to make statements about ourselves in the past tense; when Appreciative pleasures are in question we tend to make statements about the object the present tense (28).” As long as Need-pleasures are satisfied, it will pass fast. It is why we tend to make statements of Need-pleasures in the past tense.
“Moral principles (conjugal fidelity, filial piety, gratitude, and the like) may preserve the relationship for a lifetime. But where Need-love is left unaided we can hardly expect it not to “die on us” once the need is no more (30).” Need-love is not like the moral principles which may persist for a long time. Need-love is out of our control and we can’t ask it to appear or to disappear.
“The Devil was sick, the Devil a monk would be (31).” It means when we have some trouble, we will pray to God or someone; when we have no trouble, we won’t think of God and prey to him. It is just like when people need help, they will ask someone who they don’t know well to give them a hand. Only when people need help would think of someone.
Affection
In this chapter, I find some sentences that I agree with very much. First, “But almost anyone can become an object of Affection; the ugly, the stupid, even the exasperating (54).” No matter what kind people you are, your family will love you and protect you forever. Do you know why will your family do these things for you? I think it’s just because we are bound by Affection and people who care about you will accept the good and the bad things of you.
Then, “Affection is the humblest love (56).” Affection won’t be proud and it is very modest. No matter what you do, your family members are the first one who forgive and support you. Can you think of anyone else who can easily forgive you or support you? In addition, friendship also can become affection. For me, if I can share my secret and everything with my friends, I won’t consider them as my friends only; I will see them as my family members.
“If Affection is made the absolute sovereign of a human life the seeds will germinate. Love, having become a god, becomes a demon (83).” Affection is the most precious thing for me and nothing can replace it. But Affection doesn’t mean to support or forgive someone blindly.
Friendship
For some people, they think friendship is not a kind of love. Then, in this chapter, it talks about the different ideas of friendship by contrasting past with present. And it also says that friendship is “the least natural of loves (88)”.
“Without Eros none of us would have been begotten and without Affection none of us would have been reared; but we can live and breed without Friendship (88).” Although Friendship is important, Affection is more important for me. We spend most of our time with our family and when we have trouble, the family is the best choice which you can tell them what happen and ask them to help you to solve the trouble. On the other, some friendships are just meaningless. Only when they want your help, they will call and contact you.
Next, the writer think Friendship is tantamount to homosexual. “Lovers are normally face to face, absorbed in each other; Friends, side by side, absorbed in some common interest (91).” The difference between love and friendship can easily be found in our life. When I am in contact with my lover, I will use different attitude and want to stay with him forever; when I am in contact with my friends, I will always talk about our interests which we are interested in and I won’t want to stay with them forever.
Eros
At first, the writer talks about human sexuality, but he is not only concerned with it. Then, the writer says “That sexual experience can occur without Eros, without being “in love,” and that Eros includes other things besides sexual activity, I take for granted (131).” On the other hand, it also has the same meaning to the sentence “Sexuality may operate without Eros or as part of Eros (132).” Now, people’s thinking gets more and more open. And more and more people consider sexuality is casual and not important at all. As long as they can be happy, they can have sex with others easily. For me, I think sexuality is a holy thing and it must happen with my lover. I really can’t understand why some people can easily have sex with others.
“Now Eros makes a men really want, not a woman, but one particular woman (135).” I agree with it very much. Not every person is all suitable for you. Everyone will have his or her own particular person. If you haven’t met the person who is particular to you, you don’t have to worry about it. One day, the person will appear.
“In Eros at times we seem to be flying; Venus gives us the sudden twitch that reminds us we are really captive balloons (142).” Many people always think they are the happiest people when they fall in love. But in other people’s eyes, they are just fools who are brainwashed by love. They will do something they haven’t done before they fall in love; they will lower their attitude to coordinate their lovers’ demand. Moreover, they will lose some of their friends just because they only pay attention to their lovers.
The most important of all, “But Eros, honoured without reservation and obeyed unconditionally, becomes a demon (154).” I think it is a very important sentence in this chapter. It is very stupid to over reliance to Eros. When you are over reliance to Eros, you don’t know what you will lose or how you will change. I don’t mean to deny that Eros is very important; I just hope that people won’t over reliance to it.
Conclusion
In our life, there will have many kinds of loves. Each one has its own characteristic and every love can’t be replaced by another love. What is love? I know that each person will have different insight to love. In my opinion, I think everything which I have is love and love is everywhere. We can’t avoid experiencing loves, but we have to remember that we can’t be too honored any kinds of loves.
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