What I Talk about
When I Talk about Love
--Reaction to The Four Loves by Lewis
進階英文作文2Ac 彭衡
From
Wikipedia, love is a variety of different feelings, states, and attitudes that
ranges from interpersonal affection to pleasure. Love has various types,
towards other humans, one's self or animals. In a word, love is the unselfish
loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another. In The Four Loves, written by Lewis, I have read several different
loves, and I picked these types love and talked some own opinion about love.
Affection
In The Four Loves, Lewis tells us
that," Affection is not only of ' parents to offspring ' , but also of '
offspring to parents ' ". Parents give us birth, and through it we receive
affection, which is the first step to touch affection. In other words, children
get the initial impression on affection from the impact of parents. Parents not
only give birth, but raise and educate children, which is also the reason why
children often behavior like parents. Sometimes, parents play multiple roles.
Mother is a nurse when children get sick. Father is a plumber when kitchen's
water pipes get blocked. Parents try their best to contribute the little family
and look after children. With parents care, children could grew up healthily
and happily, all of which we may call it "parents to offspring".
However, actually, there is another kind of affection "offspring to
parents" as well. Lewis mentioned an example in his book, that is, after
delivering baby, mother would suffer if she refuses to give feeding within
three hours (54). That is to say, there is a paradox. It is a Need-love but
what it needs is to give. It is a Gift-love but it needs to be needed (54).
However, in The Four Loves, Lewis only discussed the affection between parents
and children. I come from a big family, in my mind, affection cannot be limited
under parents and children, but other relatives also need to be included. I am
a tujia people, and we have a long history family tree. When I was young, I
started to be taught something about my family history and ancestors. Some
people hold God or Buddha as belief, but as minorities, we believe in nature
and our ancestors. And the common originals and belief combine our family
members together. Although there are also many arguments and differences
between each little family, when we meet any big trouble or challenge, all
members would figure difficulties out together. The meaning of affection is not
talking about it, but giving a hand when be needed. The word I heard a lot from
my sister, cousins, aunt, uncle, grandparents, and parents and so on is that
nothing can become your trouble as you are in such a big family. Affection receiving
from my all family members give me a great power, and I try to give them energy
as well, to some degree, it is bidirectional affection just like what Lewis
came up with.
Friendship
Friendship is the least natural of loves (88).
In The Four Loves, there're much words
about friendship. Lewis wrote some sentences like friendship is really homosexual
(90).
From my perspective, it's true that the
same gender people are easier to make friends and more common interests. But
can we judge friendship as homosexual? Is every sense of appreciation a kind of
romantic love? The answer is, of course, not. In ancient times, girls gathered
together and boys were in a herd under such former society environment.
However, the situation changes greatly at present. Boys and girls can make
friends as well, because they also have common interests as they have the same
rights to touch the world at present. If friendship is homosexual, how to
define the friendship between different genders.
But as a smart writer, Lewis said that
hitheto I have been trying merely to describe, not to evaluable (137). Latter,
he said those who cannot conceive Friendship as a substantive love but only as
a disguise or elaboration of Eros betray the fact that they have never had a
friend (91). I can't agree with the idea more. Only such people lacks of
experience with the short-sighted view.
Eros
What is Eros?
Is it sexuality? But sexuality may
operate without Eros or as part of Eros (132). Is it just person? But the
person is particular one. Is it pleasure? But the pleasure can only been given
by the one you love. Let me hasten to add that Eros has something with the
particular person, rather than simple sexuality action or some other people.
Nowadays, with the development of society
civilization, there is an increasing number of people whose lovers are the same
gender as them, standing out to ask for the equal rights as heterosexuality.
Most of them don not require too much, what they want firstly is equality and
non-discrimination.
Broken mountain is a film directed by An
Lee in 2005. Different people got different things from watching the film. In my
mind, it is a tragic story about two lovers.
At the last time meeting, they had a
fierce argument. Facing the beautiful sights of Brokeback Mountain, where they
fell in love with each other, where witnessed their love story, Jack Twist
shouted to Ennis Del Mar, “You count the damn few times we have been together
in nearly twenty years and you measure the short fucking leash you keep me on
and then you ask me about Mexico and tell me you’ll kill me for needing
somethin’ I don’t hardly never get. You have no idea how bad it gets! I’m not
you…I can’t make it on a couple high-altitude fucks once or twice a year! You
are too much for me Ennis, you son of a whore son bitch! I wish I knew how to
quit you!” it’s really a long talking, so does Jack’s love to Ennis. Only deep
affection can continue such long years when there’s even no future to expect
for.
Every time I watch the film, I can’t
help have something complicated feelings about Ennis. There’s a man loving you
so much, but I am not sure whether you love him as he does, because you have
too many hesitations and recurrences. Do you regret after his death? As no one
loves you like him in the world any more. Of course I believe you love him when
you swear to that two T-shirts, and I even cried as well. However, I just can’t
help thinking, maybe you just love yourself more.
Jack once said they could had a good life
together, having a place of their own. But Ennis didn’t want it. So what they
got now is Brokeback Mountain. Only the nature of Brokeback Mountain can accept
their love. How a tragedy it is! In reality society, there’re also many people
loving each other, but they can’t confess their love in public sometimes,
because they just have the same genders, so some of them got sad endings like
Jack and Ennis.
What’s the problem of Eros? What’s the nature
of Eros? What’s the essence of Eros? Voltaire once said,”
I do not agree with what you have to say, but I'll defend to the death your
right to say it. Homosexual isn’t fierce floods and savage beasts, the only
difference from heterosexuality is that they love the people who have the same
gender. Since there’re also a great number of heterosexuality, we do not need
to consider about the problem of multiplying human beings. Eros is related with
the particular one, no matter with which gender.
Loves for the Sub-Human
Loves for the sub-human is a kind love
of appreciation.
If you take nature as a teacher she
will teach you exactly the lessons you had already decided to learn (35).
Nature is really a miracle existence. We can know the weather from plants, the
degree of air from moss, and even big disaster from little animals’ unusual
movements. What’s more, in some people’ eyes, like botanists, nature is holy.
Wordsworth is a biggest fan of the love of nature as well.
As what I mentioned before, as a
minority, nature is also a holy symbol in our nation. We worship nature and
believe in our ancestor changing from animals. When I was young, I just
appreciate nature, but don’t take it as holy belief. Until I experience one
thing.
When I was in senior high school, my
health got much problem. My immune system is poorer than normal people, so I
often got some little diseases. After going to hospital so many times, my
mother looked help towards a warlock, who told my mother your daughter needs to
become an old tree’s godson. The magic part is not only I did recovered from
that time, but that was a fairness night, we were worried about hurting the
gingko tree chosen, however, when I burned some cheaper money, one link of
ceremony, it started rain, and stop raining immediately after this link.
Normally, the weather like that night wouldn’t rain, but it did. After personal
experience it, I do believe in nature, and I trust the validity of the miracle
of that gingko tree bringing to me.
Love in its various forms acts a major
facilitator of interpersonal relationships, that is love enhance people's
interactions and shorten the distance between people. And no matter love
presents what certain appearances, love is beautiful all along. For me, I hope
to live through love, even live longer than love.
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